I Feel Huge

 I stand in front of the mirror, my hands tracing the curve of my swollen belly, still marveling at the changes. It’s not just my body that’s transformed—it’s my entire sense of self. Eight months ago, I couldn’t even have imagined this. I run my fingers over the roundness of my bump, feeling the baby shift slightly beneath my skin. The strangest part? It’s not strange anymore. I’ve come to accept it, even love it. Somehow, being pregnant has made me more at ease with this new identity, this new life as a woman.

Eight months ago, I wasn’t just someone who wasn’t pregnant—I wasn’t even a woman. I was still living my life as a man. The memory feels almost distant now, but I can still remember the moment that changed everything. It was supposed to be just a stupid bet with Jake, a ridiculous dare over who could win at some video game. I lost, and the stakes were…well, absurd. A transformation spell, something we thought was a complete joke. But the next morning, I woke up with curves, long hair, a softer body. I didn’t recognize myself.

At first, it was horrifying. I felt like a stranger in my own skin. My hands, my voice, my face—nothing about me was the same. It wasn’t just a different look; it was a different reality. I panicked, tried everything to reverse the spell, but nothing worked. Jake, of course, thought it was hilarious and insisted I go out for a night as a woman, just to "really experience it." I wasn’t thinking straight, so I agreed. I figured it’d just be for fun—a way to cope with the insanity.

But then I met him. At the bar that night, I found myself wrapped up in the experience of being a woman in a way I hadn’t expected. The attention, the flirting, the way he looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the room…it was intoxicating. And before I knew it, I’d spent the night with him. It was a fling, something I chalked up to the weirdest week of my life. I never imagined it would lead to a pregnancy.

When I didn’t change back into a man after a week, I was furious. This wasn’t supposed to be permanent! I thought. But then, a few weeks later, I found myself staring at two pink lines on a pregnancy test. My hands were shaking. I’d never even considered the possibility that I could get pregnant. I mean, how could I? I was a guy just a few months ago!

The first few weeks were a whirlwind of confusion and shock. The nausea, the doctor’s visits, hearing the heartbeat for the first time—it was surreal. I’d wake up every morning thinking, This isn’t real. How can this be real? But the further along I got, the more everything started to shift. My belly grew, and with each flutter and kick, I started to feel something I never expected: peace.

I place my hand over the spot where the baby just kicked again, smiling. It’s hard to explain, but being pregnant has changed the way I see myself. I’ve started to feel…natural in this body. Like I’m meant to be here, to be living this experience as a woman. The early days were full of panic and discomfort, but now, as I rub my belly and feel this life growing inside me, I feel more at home in my skin than I ever did before.

A knock on the door snaps me out of my thoughts.

“You ready yet?” Sarah’s voice calls from the hallway.

“Almost!” I shout back, pulling on my flats. I laugh a little as I try to bend over—something that’s becoming increasingly difficult these days. The baby gives another little nudge, and I rub my belly, feeling the connection between us. It’s strange how much I love this, I think. I never imagined feeling this kind of closeness, this contentment in a body that once felt like a prison.

I open the door, and Sarah and Mia are waiting, grinning at me.

“Look at you!” Mia exclaims, her eyes immediately drawn to my belly. “You look amazing!”

“Thanks,” I laugh, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “I feel huge.”

“You’re glowing,” Sarah says with a warm smile. “Seriously, you look incredible.”

As we head out to the car, I catch a glimpse of my reflection in a passing window. My dress hugs my round belly, and my hair, longer now than I ever kept it as a man, frames my face. I hardly recognize the person I used to be. The person I am now is different. Softer, calmer—more at ease. I used to feel like I was trapped in this body, but now? Now I feel like I’m growing into it. The pregnancy has grounded me, made me feel like I belong here.

I lower myself into the car with a bit of effort, grunting slightly as I settle into the seat. The baby kicks again, reminding me of their constant presence, and I rub my belly, feeling a deep, quiet sense of pride.

“How’s everything going with the baby?” Sarah asks as she starts the car, glancing at me in the rearview mirror.

“Good. They’re moving around a lot,” I say, smiling. “It’s strange, but I kind of love it. I didn’t think I would, but I do.”

Mia turns to face me. “I can’t believe how well you’ve handled all of this. I don’t know if I could do it, especially alone.”

Her words hit home. I haven’t shared everything with them—the spell, how I was a man not so long ago. But in a way, being pregnant has helped me reconcile that. I don’t feel like I’m "missing" anything anymore. I’m not the person I was, but I’ve grown into this new identity. It’s not something I planned, but I’m starting to believe it’s something I can embrace. And as much as I’ve come to terms with doing this on my own, there’s still a part of me that hopes I’ll find someone—someone who will love me and accept this baby, and maybe even want to build a family with me.

“I didn’t think I could do it either,” I say softly, my hand resting on my belly. “But it’s funny. Once this baby started growing, once I started feeling them move, everything changed. It’s like…I don’t know, like I’m meant to be doing this.”

“See? I told you, you’re going to be an amazing mom,” Sarah says with a wink.

I smile, but my thoughts drift. I never thought I’d feel so at ease in this body, in this life. I always imagined myself as someone else, living a different kind of existence. But now, the idea of motherhood, of embracing this new identity—it feels right. And while I might still be a little scared, a little unsure of what the future holds, I know that I’ve come a long way. I’ve found peace, not just in being a woman, but in being this woman.

As we pull into the restaurant parking lot, I step out of the car and stretch, rubbing my belly again as the baby kicks. I feel grounded in a way I never did before. Tonight, I’m not thinking about the man I used to be, or the strange circumstances that brought me here. Tonight, I’m just me—a woman who’s about to be a mother, and who’s finally found comfort in that.

And maybe, just maybe, I’ll find someone to share this with. But for now, I’m okay.